DexielGetsDramatic · DexielgetsSerious · Friend'sBlog · Love

Face the NEGATIVES !

I hate being out of placed. I always look at my phone and pretend Im busy. But srsly,Im always alone. I cant blame my friends for making me feel it because in the first place,I shouldn’t be making them my world. Because they can make my life a living hell,if they won’t notice me.

Im always the 11th wheeler in the group.

Im the person who laughs with them though I sometimes don’t get the point.

 The person whom they laugh at when I look like a frog at the stolen picture or as simple as a crazy idiot with the stolen shots.

The person who was publicly embarrassed.

The person who can feel his alone when you needed them the most. Where are you guys? Where are you when I needed you? Where are you when I needed someone? Where are you when I needed a power hug and a comfort? You’re there. But,the  case was,you joined the class when I became another laughingstock. I was publicly embarrassed because you laughed at me..at my report.You never understand me. Never understand. It was a slap in the face guys. Because I expected for an apology but I heard nothing. Not a single “it’s ok Dex”. But do you know what’s the unexpected thing? Our classmates,whom I never thought of comforting me,came into action. They’re there. And you aren’t.

The person who chases after you.  I’m always after the group. Why? Because Im afraid of being left out.

Im so depressed and disappointed guys. REALLY. Im the person who’s being left out in here. Im the one who goes out ALONE,takes my recess AND solve my problems ALONE.

You’re doing such favorites. Believe it or not. I can feel it Esesjeh. If you will to choose me and another member of this group,whom will you choose? Of course,the other one. Because I think among the group,Im the useless one.

Speaking of OP. I tried that many times guys. Want to hear some? First,you’re whispering to each others’ ears and I asked you what is it and you both replied,secret. It’s a secret. Why would I care about it if in the first place its not my business. So why bother? STUPID me.  Next,that picture taking thing. I dunno why but I got so OP last Friday. -.-“

Im useless/not important. For once in my life,I wished my friends would text me or just simply remembers me even though they don’t need something. Please tell me when did you remember me. When? Is it when you texted me to load your mobile number? Is it when you want the assignment’s link?or is it when ypu ask for some answers or when you’re telling me that you’ll be copyinh my homework? When guys? When are you going to remember DEXIEL not because of her stupidity,but because you need her because she’s your friend.

Im disappointed to someone. Really. Because that someone left and avoided us. We never knew the reason but again she came back and the worst thing of all,we err I mean.. I expected her sorry. Pride? Is it because of it that’s why she cant say it? After all its her fault because she avoided us and shenever voiced out her problems. END OF STORY.

Tell me Im so dramatic. Im not asking for pity here. All I need is a fresh air to voice out all my problems and WordPress is a best way to express it. To my friends who read this,you can do whatever you want. Slap me hard,kick me,go away from me, go on and try because from now on,this day and forth, I swear to the river Styx that I wil do my best to keep a balance relationship between you and our classmates.  It’s nice seeing myself smile because of you guys but it would be the best feeling ever if I can see someone comforting me when I cry.

They say you only realize a person’s worth if he’s gone and I hope it would be a wake-up call because we never knew,I might change.. and reasons might be left unsaid.

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8 thoughts on “Face the NEGATIVES !

  1. Dexiel, I haven’t moved on about this yet, so yeah. For me, you are not useless. We all have importance but I’m sorry if I let you feel you’re one. I’m sorry if I was not there when you’re alone. I’m sorry if I wasn’t there when you needed help. I’m sorry if I wasn’t able to let you feel that I am your friend. I am sorry, in behalf of them, for what happened during your report. 😦 I guess I wasn’t there, am I right? But whatever you may do, we’ll respect you–your decision as well. We wasted another chance, tsk. Whatever consequences, we’ll accept.

    But I guess I won’t let her be the reason I’ll lose a friend for the second time. I got through this again, and I won’t let it happen. :/

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    1. Queen,thank you. You never knew how happy I was to meet a person like you. This junior year of us,you and merrah are my closest friends. So thank you for giving me another reason to laugh even though they aren’t there. Thanks to you and Merrah.

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    1. April is so senti…..Dex, i’m sorry if….if…..wala akong masabing matino sayo in english ha..lusaw utak ko ngayon eh. haha. But, be positive. Remember there are 7 billion humans here on earth, not eleven. just forgive and move on. Major major FORGIVE AND MOVE ON! I thank you…

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      1. after i commented, i just sit here and read it again and again , remembering how bad i am in motivating and encouraging. it doesn’t really help, does it? but i hope it does. it’s ok to learn how to be independent dex, but not all the time. WE ARE HERE…not just me and queen or some of the esesjeh, but ALL our classmates. or it can be almost all. but whatever the circumstances are, we’re still here. don’t be fooled by your negative feelings. they can hurt you like you hurt other people by not noticing it. kaya nga may word na forgiveness di ba? look at the positive side, the worst is behind us.

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