With the absence of human beings who could hear my sentiments, I am back once again to blabber about things I felt recently. Let me talk about betrayal and true friendship. We were on an intensive training at Dao and we stayed there for 2 ights and three days. So, the first night was kinda fun because my friends and I were laughing to death. But there was this issus were my feet really got stinky and I know the shit sucks so I took a shower and left the shoes at the rack in the bathroom. The following night, I really didn’t have any idea that “my issue/the shit that smells” were my friends’ main topic and some of them transferred to the other room. I was really clueless that they would sleep in the other room while me, on the other hand, layed down at mu deck earlier than usual because Im so tired due to the intensive training. Rose entered the room, which makes both of us the only beings inside the quarter. I started closing my eyes, trying to sleep, when Merrah entered the room. They ate something and I probably got up because Im thirsty. Then they told me that we should not sleep yet and talk about things until we decided to sleep. We talked things about our family & lovelife. And then, beforr midnight, the two were looking at me and pushing each other who got to say something first. Y They told me that I should not get mad upon hearing the thing they’re about to say and told me that O should face the consequence that lies ahead upon knowing their news. They told me about my ever-loyal bestfriends which was about the stinky shoes at the bathroom which was the reason why they didn’t want to stay at the room anymore. Merrah then told me that my FRIENDS exaggerated the fact and made it nastier when you heard it. Rose then added that the room was not smelly and NOT THAT SMELLY as what the others thought. I was left in awe as I listened to them-tears about to fall and a lump on my throat started to form. Of course, I know the odor issue but what hurt my feelings was the fact that they backstabbed me and never told the truth in my face. They even pretended that the room was inhabited by some ghosts which scared them and told me things.. things that I thought were really true but instead a cover for their lie. Rose and Merrah blabbered at the upper deck. They admitted that they wanted or shall I say, tempted, to join the other group. But when they were on the other room, they hesitated to join the group because: one, they know that Im about to sleep ALONE in the quarter and two, they were irritated about the gossips my friends, the people I really thought would tell me frankly, told to other roomates. The thought that the issue were not kept and was gossip to the other joirnalists hit my heart and probably broke it. I felt humiliated and betrayed by my friends, by Esesjeh. By the people whom I thought would stay by my side even how dirty I am. They were backstabbing me, telling jokes about how imperfect I am. Imperfect in a way, that for the first time in four years, my feet stinks. I hated them. A part of me hated them because they were not contented in the info and shared them. Now, others were laughing behind my back. They even told the ones who didn’t believe to come and check it for theirselves. And one thing’s sure, real friendship would show itself. Merrah and Rose were the only ones who cared for me. I dont know how they were able to face me this morning, with their wide smile and happy faces greeting me good morning and asking me how was my sleep. But I know, I just know, that behind those masks were faces of irritation and judgement for their friend. I couldn’t bear not to communicate with them but just like a broken mirror, part of me was broken too. And they could never bring it back. on the brighter side, 2 months left and I can finally get rid of their look and everything. Im hurt, im broke and misunderstood and depressed and betrayed.